And the Knee Socks Were Only a Little Help

Concerned guy: So, were you wearing a loincloth?
Friend: See, that's the thing, I don't know.

Memorial University
St. John's, Newfoundland
Canadia

Overheard by: Mel

Posted on June 3, 2019
Ass, Canadia, Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Default, Friends, Guys, Penis, Questions

That's What You Said About the Guy Who Was Blowing You Yesterday

Policewoman: I seen you beggin'. You don't know that guy, but he gave you money.
Hobo: Sweetness, sweetness, listen. That's my brother.
Policewoman: You have a white brother?
Hobo: My brother in Christ.

Urbana, Illinois

Posted on June 1, 2019
Cops, Family ties, Hobos, Illinois, Jesus, Money, Panhandling, Questions, Race

As Opposed to Doing the Voodoo That You Do So Well

Girl: She really hated you for awhile, though. She even made a voodoo doll of you.
Guy: Are you fucking serious?!
Girl: Well, she Velcroed a bunch of angry words to a cabbage patch doll and then cried because she was afraid the doll thought she was angry at it specifically.
Guy: She always maintained an impressive level of incompetence.

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on May 30, 2019
Default, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Massachusetts, Questions, Weirdness, Words

The Type Of Question That Should Be on the SATs

Teenage boy to school friend: Dude, why would you buy a pocket vagina and not use it?

High School
Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Murray

Posted on May 23, 2019
Connecticut, Friends, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Shopping, Teens, Toys, Vagina

They Wear Silly Clothing and Nothing Much Happens?

Professor, in regards to nationalism in film: Now what makes a film “British”?
Valedictorian: They all speak British?

University of Texas
Austin, Texas

Overheard by: Adam

Posted on May 22, 2019
Colleges & Universities, Education, Geography, Questions, Students, Teachers, Texas

…Whilst Avoiding Useful Work

Cashier #1: Hey, did you put all those resumes from today with the other pile?
Cashier #2: Oh. Um, I didn't think we were actually hiring, so I might have thrown them out.

London
Canadia

Overheard by: I'm not applying here

Posted on May 18, 2019
Canadia, Employees, Jobs & Careers, Questions, Stupidity

How to Come Out As Trans in One Easy Step

Teenage girl to another: You know what I really hate? When your balls sweat.

Glenfield College
Auckland
New Zealand

Overheard by: Kelly

Posted on May 15, 2019
Balls, Colleges & Universities, Default, Feelings, Girls, New Zealand, Questions, Teens

Edgar Allen Poe Was a Difficult Kid to Raise

Mother: Honey, do you remember mommy’s friend Denise?
Four-year-old son: Uh-huh.
Mother: Well, mommy has to leave right now, because Denise’s father passed away, and I have to go and tell Denise that I’m sorry.
Four-year-old son: Oh. Did you kill him?

Port Jefferson, New York

Overheard by: arctinus