Stupidity

Football player #1: What are you getting?
Football player #2: I think I'm gonna get four hot dogs.
Football player #1: Dude! You're only supposed to eat three a week! It's like…the sodium or something. Three hot dogs have all the sodium you're supposed to have in a week.
Football player #2: You're fucking retarded! I'm getting four hot dogs and I'm gonna eat all four of them in their sodium goodness. Watch me.

Dining Hall, Ball State University
Muncie, Indiana

Overheard by: Colleen

Girl wearing long, flowy skirt to friend: I just feel a deep connection with the lighting of this room. I'm a big fan of lighting.

Maryland

Drunk Asian kid entering kitchen at party: I just went to use the bathroom, but there was some weird Asian girl waiting outside the door.
Sober, bitter girl: Are you sure it wasn't just a mirror?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/417242384/now-that-you-mention-it.html

Overheard by: bitter girl's roommate

Punk chick #1: Well, it’s just… I’m confused…
Punk chick #2: It’s okay, it’s summer! There are a lot of confusing things in the air, like love… and pollen.

Maryland

Frazzled principal addressing group of volunteers in library: Sorry I'm a little late everybody, I had to pull a kid out from underneath my car.

Weslaco, Texas

Professor: So, first of all, there's the gigantitude of the bong…

North Central Michigan College

Overheard by: Maggie

Sunday school instructor: Hate is a very, very strong adjective.

Donkey Coffee
Athens, Ohio

Overheard by: Lisa

Professor: Can you tell us about the conversion of Ireland?
Student: I dunno. Something about Saint Patrick and a snake? I’m not sure what he did with the snake.

http://overheardinlawschool.blogspot.com/2007/03/it-didnt-have-to-do-with-potatos-and.html

Overheard by: jw

Telemarketer: Hi, is Mr. Sa– Sama– Samata–
Guy: Go ahead. You can do it.
Telemarketer: Sama– Samthan– Sermana–
Guy: You mean Mr. [says name]?
Telemarketer: Yes, is Mr. [repeats name] available?
Guy: Nope, sorry [hangs up phone].

Kalamazoo, Michigan

Overheard by: amused girlfriend

Girl during evolution lab in biology: So, humans came from monkeys, right? So, if two monkeys had a baby and it was a human, like, what would we do with it?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/292935894/put-it-in-biology-class.html

Overheard by: we would name it tarzan.