Last Time I Tried That, the Other Girl and I Both Ended Up with Concussions

(women's restroom, a man in a Santa suit enters)
Drunk woman: Hey, you're not a boy!
Restroom attendant: You mean he's not a girl.
Drunk woman: Yeah, you're not a girl!
Drunk Santa: Ho ho ho, ladies! I just wanted to see what you wanted for Christmas!
Drunk woman: Huh?
Restroom attendant: I want money, haha!
Drunk Santa: Then cross your labia, ladies, and merry Christmas!
(he leaves)
Drunk woman: Wait, what?

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Elizabeth

Posted on October 19, 2016
Default, Drunks, Guys, Illinois, Insults, Money, Restroom, Santa Claus, Vagina, Wishes, Women

But, Oddly Enough, Nine Months Later Sean Preston Was Born

Young professional woman: So, my husband and I decided we were ready to have a baby, but when I got pregnant I sort of freaked out and thought I wasn't ready. So I went out with my girlfriends, ate a bunch of sushi, smoked a pack of cigarettes and drank a fifth of tequila. Sure enough, the next day, I got my period. That shit really is bad for the pregnancy.

Flight over Atlanta, Georgia

Posted on September 15, 2016
Airports & flights, Default, Drinking & drunks, Family ties, Feelings, Food, Georgia, Pregnancy, Relationships, Smoking, Women

Right After He Repairs My Cable Box

Woman #1: Dammmnnn girl! This metro so damn crowded!
Woman #2: Shit yeah! Too many people here.
Woman #1: Don't worry, Obama gonna take care of that.

http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/11/metro-yes-we-can.html

Overheard by: Ian

Posted on September 9, 2016
Gripes, Other sites, Politics, Public transportation, Weirdness, Women

For Instance, She's Always Refusing to Change My Diaper!

Woman to friend: I don't know why she wants a baby. I mean, she doesn't even like poo.

Edmonton
Canadia

Posted on August 7, 2016
Canadia, Offspring, Poop, Sensory experiences, Weirdness, Women

We're Just Two Very Misguided People Colliding in Space

Redhead to 30-something man: You like Jason Mraz. I like Jason Mraz. Therefore, we're not having an affair.

Line for Jason Mraz Concert
Hammersmith Apollo, London
England

Overheard by: Tom

Posted on July 3, 2016
Compare and contrast, Default, England, Music, Relationships, Sexuality, Women

You've Never Done Your Own Taxes Before, Have You?

Lady walking out of an alley to man: I can't do it now, I'd have to take my shoes off and I'm not wearing any underwear.

Sacramento, California

Overheard by: Ambroziak

Posted on July 2, 2016
California, Guys, Shoes, Undies, Women

In Her Basement

Woman #1: He's 41 and a millionaire, what's wrong with him?
Woman #2: He lives with his mother.

Geelong
Australia

Overheard by: laughing

Posted on June 29, 2016
Age and ageing, Australia, Default, Family ties, Money, Questions, Women

And Hides It under All the Ruffles

Woman, pointing to dress: That's nice and flowy. Not for me, but totally something Christine would wear.
Friend, indifferent: Oh yeah, Christine.
Woman: She throws up her food, though.
Friend, trailing off: Oh yeah, that's right.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/329248039/nothing-to-be-concerned-about.html

Overheard by: alexis