Girl: Wait, I got some action from Alex* once when he was drunk… Does that make me a predator?
Guy: No, guys don’t really mind being taken advantage of.
Girl: Well, because he did pass out on me…
Oak Park, Illinois
Overheard by: Erin
Girl: Wait, I got some action from Alex* once when he was drunk… Does that make me a predator?
Guy: No, guys don’t really mind being taken advantage of.
Girl: Well, because he did pass out on me…
Oak Park, Illinois
Overheard by: Erin
Train conductor: For those of you who had too much to drink, could you please wake up long enough to present your ticket?
Chicago, Illinois
Grungy young man, after loudly prattling on about drinking 12 Smirnoffs a day, weed, and massage therapy: I didn't believe in the inner-spiritual plane until I saw my unborn child's soul whisked away.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Anon Y. Mouse
Drunk guy holding a forty: Malt liquor. This is going to get us buff, yo.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Meech
Coed #1: So we're finally officially dating. I mean it's been, like, six months!
Coed #2: Great! That's moving forward!
Coed #1: Yeah. He said the first six months I was on “dating probation” and now I'm on “girlfriend probation.” His friend got drunk at the bar and was all like “what, you haven't made her official yet?” so he's like, “you have my friend to thank for this.”
UNCG
Greensboro, North Carolina
Overheard by: Put him on boyfriend probation
Guy to ex-wife (about drunkenness): Yeah, the best time was at that wedding when you started drinking down those cinnamon things, and flashed that guy.
Oakland, Oregon
Overheard by: Erin
Cop, helping hobo into jacket inside store: You are not drunk enough to be acting like this. People are going to think you are just mean.
Hobo: I *am* mean!
Sugarhood Smiths
Sugarhood, Utah
Spanish professor, as class leaves on Friday: Be careful driving when you drink this weekend!
Hanover College
Hanover, Indiana
Overheard by: whitney
Vice principal: Listen up, everyone! The rules of the school also apply at the bowling alley. If you smoke, drink, or do drugs, we will call the cops. If you break anything, you will have to pay. If you hump the ball machine for the sake of irony, you will be sent home. That means you, Aaron*!
Aaron*: Aw, man!
High School
Englewood, Colorado
Guy #1: This root beer is really… inspirational.
Guy #2, thoughtfully: Canadians like all types of beer…
Hot Docs Festival
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Felicity Thistle
