Are There No Gay Cougars?

Fratty-looking queer #1: I need some lip balm. My lips feel all dried up, like…old fruit.
Fratty looking queer #2: You are an old fruit. (pause) No, really, you're 25, which means you're almost 30, which means you're almost dead.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: gymbo

Posted on March 7, 2020
Age and ageing, Body parts, Death & dying, Default, Feelings, Fruit, Massachusetts, Queers

If He Asked You Out, He Probably Likes Crazy Drag Queens

Girl looking at herself in the mirror to stranger: Do I look crazy? Do I look like a drag queen? I'm on a first date and I'm really nervous.

Bar Bathroom
Chicago, Illinois

Posted on January 26, 2020
Bars & Clubs, Default, Fears, Feelings, Girls, Illinois, Questions, Restroom

Pop Quiz: Calculate the Odds It Will Actually Be Fine

Guy to girl in motel breakfast room: Fine! You want to fuck, then let's fuck!

Seattle, Washington

Posted on January 23, 2020
Couples, Feelings, Relationships, Sex, Washington

Buy Me a Pony and I'll Throw in the Windshield

Little girl sitting in shopping cart to mother: I love you more than the car! That's a lot,right, mommy? (thinks a while) More than the lights, too!

Wal-Mart
Weslaco,Texas

Overheard by: I love Mommy too

Posted on January 3, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Feelings, Girls, Kids, Malls, Texas, Weirdness

I've Lost 10 Pounds Since I Started Sending Myself to Bed Without Supper!

Girl with blue hair, excitedly on cell: I love it when I inspire my own maternal instincts!

National Mall
Washington, DC

Posted on December 13, 2019
Feelings, Girls, Malls, On the phone, Parenting, Washington, DC

On Today’s Episode Of Skanky and the Brain…

Girl #1: Yeah, Dave*’s cute. Not super-attractive, but I’d sleep with him.
Girl #2: I wouldn’t.
Girl #1: Why not?
Girl #2: I made a pact with myself that I would never date him.
Girl #1: Yeah, but did you say you wouldn’t sleep with him?
Girl #2: No, I guess not.
Girl #1: So there’s, like, a loophole. You can sleep with him, just don’t date him.
Girl #2: Yeah, I guess so. Cool.
Girl #1: God, I’m so smart.

Valencia Community College
Orlando, Florida

Posted on December 6, 2019
Bimbettes, Default, Feelings, Florida, Friends, Girls, Relationships, Sex, Stupidity

One Day You Will Make Some Dork Very, Very Happy

20-something chick to friend on cell: I like how you're listening to the message I left you while I'm standing right here.
Friend: I just want to make sure I get the message, I don't want to be like one of those people who calls you back without listening to the message.
20-something chick: I hate those people! It's like, what if the message was really important? Like, “Help me, I'm dying! Don't call me back–it sets off the bomb!”

University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia

Overheard by: Good point