Girl to friends: Fuck Europe! I got Tanzania all up on my ass!
Atlanta, Georgia
Random girl in hallway: If you have a stuffy nose and are in an elevator with someone who just farted, but you don't know they did, does it still smell bad?
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Jen
Drunk girl in bar during Rose Bowl: It's official–I'm going to be ovulating on my wedding day.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Double V
Girl #1: I hallucinated that you and my boyfriend had sex in the spirit world! I think I hallucinated I was using an umbrella in the shower this morning.
Girl #2: Uh. No… Sorry, I found one in our shower.
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Loud girl: And my mother said to me, “Well, I guess you're an adult now, since you have adult sex.” And I was like, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” and she was like, “I opened your cupboard.” and I was thinking, “Oh shit!” because I've got a lot of shit in there. I've got porn, I've got a vibrator, a cock ring. I've got things she doesn't even know what to call them!
University of Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Alex Remnick
Woman to girl: What exactly is a zombie? My son wants to know. Is it like a ghost?
Girl: A zombie is the living dead. A ghost is just a spirit, while a zombie is the dead body.
Woman: Like Michael Jackson?
Girl: Yes, like Michael Jackson.
Yarmouth, Maine
Overheard by: Jade
Girl #1: Does she need a green card?
Girl #2: No.
Girl #1: So he just loves her?
Los Angeles, California
Girl #1: I got a lot of color without being in the sun very much; just in the car.
Girl #2: I'm so jealous!
Girl #1: Well, I also went to the tanning salon…
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Girl on bus: I've been trying to quit drinking and she was all like, “have some juice with me!” And then she pulls out a half gallon of vodka, and I'm all, “bitch, what you doing?”
Seattle, Washington
Girl: I wish I had a lovable face. My face is deceitful.
Bakersfield, California
Overheard by: Sarah
