That Was an Olsen Twin

Teenage girl: Ohmigod, guess what!
Boyfriend: What?
Teenage girl: I just ran over a possum and it humped my car!

Chattanooga, Tennessee

Posted on March 29, 2026
Animals, Couples, Death & dying, Default, Girls, Guys, Teens, Tennessee, Words

Some People Love Jesus More Than Others

Girl: Seriously, she’s completely obsessed. Like all of her final drawings were of his penis. Like all of them.

Roanoke, Virginia

Overheard by: Abbie

Posted on March 28, 2026
Default, Girls, Mental illnesses, Penis, Sexuality, Virginia, Weirdness

For the Last Time, That’s Not What Lilliputians Are

Girl: So yeah, it would just be like Gulliver’s Travels.
[Pause.]Boy: There’d be kitten penises everywhere!

Warwick, England

Posted on March 27, 2026
Books, Compare and contrast, Girls, Guys, Penis, UK, Weirdness

But We Call Them “American Voters”

American chick #1: Ohmigod! Look at those white cows! I’ve never seen cows like that before!
American chick #2: Maybe they’re albino… Or it could be a special British type of cow.
Guy sitting behind them: … Those are sheep.

Bus, Southern England

Overheard by: pretends to be Canadian

Posted on March 26, 2026
Animals, Bus, Comebacks, Compare and contrast, Friends, Geography, Girls, Guys, Idiots, Stupidity, Tourists, UK

Something Just Expanded –Possibly My Awareness

Barista guy, gesturing toward mug of Sharpies: Are you aware that these markers cost ninety-nine cents each?
Barista chick: Are you aware that I want to get my nipples pierced?

Starbuck’s, Castro Street
Mountain View, California

Overheard by: touché

Posted on March 25, 2026
Baristas, Bringing it back to you, California, Girls, Guys, Money, Nipples, Questions, Restaurants, Wishes

Also Why She Refuses to Play Musical Chairs

Girl #1: Isn’t lap dancing anal sex?
Girl #2: Uhh, excuse me?
Girl #1: Well, if a girl sits on a guy’s lap and he gets an erection, it would go [points up] up the ass, right?

High School
Australia

Overheard by: NinjaPirates

Posted on March 22, 2026
Ass, Australia, Backdoor, Compare and contrast, Dancing, Erections, Girls, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High]

I Mean I Have a Case of the Cups

American guy: Hmm, what should we have for desert?
French girl: I’ve been craving crab cakes. With frosting.
American guy: Uhh, you mean cupcakes?!

3rd St West Hollywood
Los Angeles, California

Posted on March 22, 2026
California, Food, Foreigners, Girls, Guys, Language barrier, Questions, Words

Was I Awake?

Tipsy girlfriend, playing “Never Have I Ever”: Never have I ever done 69 with anyone.
Boyfriend: Ping.
Girlfriend: What?! Who did you 69?!
Boyfriend: You, fool!
Girlfriend: Oh.

Ohio University
Athens, Ohio

Overheard by: outfirst

Posted on March 16, 2026
Colleges & Universities, Comebacks, Couples, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, Games, Girls, Guys, Ohio, Questions, Relationships, Sex

Do I Need to Show You the Algorithm Again?

Guy: I would ask her out, but she’s just so dumb. I mean, like, soo dumb.
Girl: Can’t you just overlook that for one night?
Guy: She’s not quite cute enough.

San Jose, California

Posted on March 15, 2026
Beauty, California, Girls, Guys, Questions, Relationships, Stupidity

Kinda Misleading That His Name’s Mario, Though

Teen girl #1: Your dad could be a plumber because of his moustache.
Teen girl #2: My dad doesn’t have a moustache.
Teen girl #1: Well I wish he did.
Teen girl #2: Too bad, bitch!

North Bay
Ontario
Canadia

Posted on March 12, 2026
Canadia, Compare and contrast, Family ties, Girls, Insults, Jobs & Careers, Shaving, Teens, Wishes

Girls