When Was the Last Time You Got 20 Years for Jaywalking?

Guy: Statutory rape is the jaywalking of sex crimes!

Interbay Golf
Seattle, Washington

Posted on October 14, 2018
Crimes, Guys, Washington

If No One Hears Them, Are They Really Dead?

Man: There are mutes dying all over the world, and they can't say anything! So here I am…

Providence, Rhode Island

Posted on October 10, 2018
Death & dying, Guys, Language barrier, Rhode Island, Weirdness

…And a Very Merry Anal-Fisting.

Good looking dude, walking up to friend: Cunnilingus!
Good looking friend: And cunnilingus to you too.

Wits University
Johannesburg
South Africa

Posted on October 7, 2018
Africa, Colleges & Universities, Default, Friends, Guys, Holidays, Licking, Weirdness, Words

If the Tagline Isn’t “Gotta Fuck Them All” Then Someon Made a Mistake

Girl: The first Pokemon movie was really sad.
Guy #1: Oh, yeah! It made me cry.
Girl: I couldn’t believe when Pikachu almost died…
Guy #2: Have you guys seen Pokemon porn?
Girl: Okay, let’s just stop right there.
Guy #2: No, it’s crazy. You know Misty? She’ll do like anything!

Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Claire

Posted on September 30, 2018
Connecticut, Death & dying, Feelings, Friends, Girls, Guys, Movies, Offers and requests, Porn, Questions, TV shows, Weirdness

One Of the Perks of Hiring Jesus As a Bartender

Guy on cell: I'll buy you an infinite beer!

UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts

Posted on September 29, 2018
Colleges & Universities, Default, Drinking & drunks, Guys, Massachusetts, Offers and requests, On the phone

Mom's Just Mean

Guy #1: Yo, she can't be saying that “you small shit” to you, man. Was it limp or fully flexed?
Guy #2: No, it was ready to go.
Guy #1: Damn, she trippin.

Tysons Corner, Vriginia

Posted on September 23, 2018
Guys, Insults, Questions, Virginia, Weirdness

Don’t Worry– We’ll Only Use the Minorities

Boy: We could have the clones test nuclear bombs!
Girl: They’re not robots. They’re real people.
Boy: So? They still blow up.

Seattle, Washington

Posted on September 19, 2018
Death & dying, Default, Girls, Guys, Violence, Washington

She Escaped from the Closet and Alerted Red Riding Hood

Fat suit on cell: Damn that grandma!

Russell Square Station
London
England

Posted on September 17, 2018
Age and ageing, Family ties, Fat people, Guys, Insults, Public transportation, Suits, UK, Words

Ask John Wayne

Man playing fantasy board game: You can have as many pilgrims as you want!

Wegmans
Woodbridge, New Jersey

Posted on September 13, 2018
Feelings, Guys, New Jersey, Religion, Weirdness

Dolly Parton Doesn't Get Out Much These Days

Blonde: Oh my god! Are you wearing makeup?
Black man in drag: Yes I am, sugar.
Blonde: Where did you get it?
Black man in drag: Um, the store.
Blonde: Do they make makeup for black people?

Pigeon Forge, Tennessee

Overheard by: Natalie

Posted on September 9, 2018
Default, Girls, Guys, Questions, Race, Tennessee, Weirdness

Guys