They Are Currently in Place

Well-dressed man to female companion, in crowded tasting room: Did you remember the dildo?
Elegant lady companion: Yes, I brought both of them.

Napa Valley wine Auction
St. Helena, California

Posted on March 10, 2020
California, Couples, Default, Etiquette, Guys, Offers and requests, Questions, Relationships, Suits, Toys, Women

Hey, I Tried Pilates for You Guys.

Beefy tattooed inmate: Hey, does anyone know how to play twister?
(rest of unit groans)

Vancouver Island Maximum Security Prison
Canadia

Posted on March 5, 2020
Canadia, Default, Games, Guys, Gym rats, Offers and requests, Questions

I Am One With My Car

Young woman to girl, after car accident: Do you have car insurance or anything?
College girl: Blue Cross Blue Shield.
Young woman: … Uhh… That would be health insurance.

South Burlington, Vermont

Overheard by: Charlee

Posted on March 2, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Offers and requests, Questions, Sorority types, Stupidity, Vermont, Women

You Must Be Gay, Then

Boy: So, do you have a boyfriend?
Cute, chubby girl, with suspicion: No…
Boy: Can I get your number?
Girl: No.
Boy: Why?
Girl: I'm gay.
Boy: Oh… Really?
Girl: No. Sorry. Creeper reflex.
Boy: So you wanna go out?
Girl: No.

Starbucks
Manhattan, New York

Posted on February 13, 2020
Bars & Clubs, Bonding, Gender issues, Girls, Guys, Lies, New York, Offers and requests, Questions, Sexuality

At the Bad First Date Olympics

Woman eating Chinese food to man sitting across: Why don't you try some? It's good.
Man in creepy English accent: No, I get equal or more pleasure watching you eat.

Vancouver
Canadia

Posted on February 12, 2020
Canadia, Food, Guys, Offers and requests, Sensory experiences, Women

There Are Men Out There Who Would Pay Top-Dollar for the Privilege.

Girl: Yeah, I brushed my teeth! (pause) You want to lick my gums and see?

Chinatown
Edmonton
Canadia

Overheard by: Laura

Posted on December 31, 2019
Body parts, Canadia, Default, Girls, Offers and requests, Questions

We'll Be Departing Just As Soon As These Pills Wear Off

Pilot over loudspeaker (riffing on harmonica): This is your captain speaking, (harmonica riff) Welcome aboard, (harmonica riff) Please fasten your seat belts. (harmonica riff) Or we won't be able to leave beautiful Atlanta, Georgia.
(does long, jazzy harmonica riff. Passengers applaud)
Pilot (in Elvis voice): Thank you very much.

American Airlines Flight
Atlanta, Georgia

Posted on December 31, 2019
Airports & flights, Default, Georgia, Music, Nipples, Offers and requests, Pilots, Public transportation

Actually, Crutchy Was the Only Crippled Newsie

Girl on cell: Wait! (pause) So, it's a gang for crippled people?

Orlando, Florida

Posted on December 25, 2019
Default, Drinking & drunks, Drugs, Florida, Girls, Offers and requests, Questions

You Won't Feel a Thing, I Promise

Long-nosed cute blond girl: So you're basically offering to fuck me in the arse?
Drunk guy: Not in the arse per se, but I can't guarantee that I won't get the wrong hole and just go for it.
Long-nosed cute blond girl: You do know we just met five minutes ago?
Drunk guy: What can I say? I work fast.

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Posted on December 18, 2019
Ass, Backdoor, Drunks, England, Girls, Offers and requests, Philosophy

Can't a Girl Do an Underwearless Can-Can Without Public Scrutiny?

Ghetto lady to two young boys: Stop lookin at my pussy!

20 Bus
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: nightfallcub

Posted on December 6, 2019
Colorado, Default, Hoochies, Offers and requests, Sexuality, Vagina, Women

Offers and requests