Kids Are Easily Fooled by Short Haircuts and Baritone Voices

Mother holding small child as she sees a girlfriend: Sammi* look! It’s Debbie! Say hi to Debbie!
Small child: Hi, ugly man!

Target
Traverse City, Michigan

Posted on July 17, 2021
Assholes, Default, Kids, Michigan, Moms, Parenting, Stores, Women

Your Editors Can't Wait for That Sitcom

Very short gay man: It's so hard being a vegetarian. My parents can't accept my sexuality or my religion… I'm living in a toilet!

Guernsey
England

Overheard by: Catie

Posted on April 24, 2021
England, Food, Parenting, Queers, Religion, Sexuality

Not Until You Figure Out Which Wire to Clip, Sweetie.

Mother: Just sit there a minute. I need to go say goodbye to Jamie*.
Three-year-old boy, buckled into stroller, trying to stand: Let me out of this booby trap!

County Fair
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Cat

Posted on January 16, 2021
California, Kids, Moms, Offspring, Parenting, Wishes

…Mister “I Cut Myself with Safety Scissors”

Son to father, exiting hospital: Dad, what's a disability?
Father: It's like when someone loses their finger in an accident, (pause) which will probably happen to you.

http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/04/father-knows-best.html

Overheard by: Jon

Posted on January 10, 2021
Dads, Eavesdrop DC, Hands, Health & Hygiene, Kids, Parenting, Weirdness, Words

Remember What Happened to Your Sister the S'more?

Six-year-old boy: Mom! I want a cookie.
Mom: If you don't start behaving you're going to turn into a deep-fried boy on a stick at the state fair.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/382002415/someone-will-try-that-next-year.html

Overheard by: Ian

Posted on January 9, 2021
Default, Food, Guys, Kids, Moms, Overheard in Minneapolis, Parenting, Threats, Wishes

That's for Him to Decide

New dad: Look! These clothes are cute. Oh, look at this dress!
New mum: You have a boy, not a girl!

Department Store
Melbourne
Australia

Posted on December 20, 2020
Australia, Beauty, Clothes, Clothing, Dads, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Sexuality, Stores

Doughnuts, at Least, Are Cheaper by the Dozen

Mother to daughter: And soon you'll be having babies…
Daughter's friend: I want a baby.
Daughter: What?!
Friend: Actually I want a doughnut, but no one was listening to me.

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: and i want a pony

Posted on December 6, 2020
Canadia, Family, Food, Friends, Moms, Parenting, Pregnancy, Wishes

This Is Why I Divorced Your Father

Mother to child: You need to get up off the floor.
Kid: No!
(small dog approaches, starts licking kid's face)
(kid laughs as mother becomes even angrier, then dog begins humping kid)
Kid: Get him off me, get him off me!
Mother, calmly: See? This is what happens when you lie on the floor. This is why we can't lay down on the floor.

Portland, Maine