Just Remember, “A Friend in Bed Is a Friend in Head”

Guy on cell: So, when are you coming back? You know, anytime you wanna come up here, you got a cock waiting for you.

Hoboken, New Jersey

Overheard by: Cris

Posted on March 20, 2019
Default, Guys, New Jersey, Offers and requests, On the phone, Penis, Questions, Sexuality

Someone’s Been Reading People at the Dentist’s Office

Mom: Did you hear that Harry Lee died?
20-something daughter: Yea, and Sylvester Stallone came to the funeral, I thought that was odd.
Previously uninterested dad: Interesting fact about Sylvester Stallone- he has a penial implant.

Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Posted on March 12, 2019
About celebrities, Dads, Death & dying, Family, Girls, Gossip, Louisiana, Moms, Penis, Weirdness

… Little Candy Chlamydia

Woman with two toddlers, ordering cake: I need a P-E-N-I-S cake…
Manager, walking in, gleefully oblivious: Ohhh, a penis cake! We can put fake hair on it. Last time, we had fake semen shooting out…

Huntington, California

Posted on March 4, 2019
Bosses, California, Candy, Default, Moms, Penis, Stupidity, Words

Too Late!

Girl, trying to measure three different spring pans: How are you going to measure that?
Guy: To be honest, I'm thinking about the size of my penis.
Girl: Um…
Guy: I think this one is the one that's seven inches.
Girl: Uh…
Guy: If anyone asks, I never did this.

Jersey City, New Jersey

Posted on January 4, 2019
Girls, Guys, New Jersey, Penis, Questions

But I Still Adored Gone with the Wind.

Naked dude #1: I'm really surprised by how long it is.
Naked dude #2: Yeah… It's quite long.

Locker Room
Kansas City, Missouri

Posted on December 4, 2018
Bragging, Compare and contrast, Guys, Missouri, Penis, Restroom

To Errol Is Human. My Dick: Divine.

Greek girlfriend: She misses you baby.
English boyfriend: Hm?
Greek girlfriend: She misses you.
English boyfriend: Who misses me?
Greek girlfriend: Helena.
English boyfriend: Who's Helena?
Greek girlfriend: My vagina, baby.
Indian guy at table: You named your snatch Helena?! Really? You named your vagina?
Greek girlfriend: Sure, don't you have a name for your dick?
Indian guy and English boyfriend, at same time: No.
Greek girlfriend: I've always thought of your dick as being called Errol, baby.

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep