I Promise Not to Look at Joan Rivers from Now On

20-something guy: Why are you so concerned about this?
20-something girl: No, seriously. It will split your corneas in half.
20-something guy: Wow, I hadn't thought about that.

St. Paul, Minnesota

Posted on January 24, 2022
Body parts, Default, Fears, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Minnesota, Questions, Weirdness

I Notice You Came Up with That Description Awfully Quickly

Dude #1: Dude, are you still drunk?
Dude #2: Maybe a little, how could you tell?
Dude #1: You smell like beer, weed, and hooker spit!

Lecture Hall
University of Tennessee

Overheard by: bluecollarbelle

Posted on January 24, 2022
Colleges & Universities, Default, Drinking & drunks, Drugs, Drunks, Guys, Questions, Sensory experiences, Tennessee

When the Elderly Are Exposed to Adam Corolla

Old lady to grown daughter: Well you know what your brother's problem is? He's pussy-whipped!

San Jose, California

Posted on January 20, 2022
California, Default, Family ties, Old folks, Questions, Vagina, Women

…and Rent All the Cool Cars

Little girl: (talking over airport announcement)
Father: Quiet for a second!
Girl: (continues talking until announcement is over)
Father: Great. What if he was saying “Run! Zombies!”? We'll be sitting here like idiots while the zombies come…

O'Hare Airport
Chicago, Illinois

Posted on January 17, 2022
Airports & flights, Compare and contrast, Dads, Default, Family, Guys, Illinois, Offers and requests, Questions, Zombies

Can They Still Call It Martha Stewart Living?

Girl on cell: Wait… Wait! You’re telling me she’s not a zombie? You mean she’s actually dead?

Emory College
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Zack

Posted on January 16, 2022
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Death & dying, Default, Georgia, Girls, On the phone, Questions, Weirdness

If I Get Good Grades This Semester?

Asian girl: Can I have two penises?

Market Street
San Francisco, California

Posted on January 10, 2022
Asians, California, Penis, Questions, Weirdness, Wishes

I’m Just Trying to Understand Jerry Falwell’s Appeal

Chick walking with a bunch of guys: Wait, did he have a scrotum chin?

Allston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: mt

Posted on January 8, 2022
Chicks, Massachusetts, Questions

With the Possible Exception of the Dominant Chord

Professor: So, how was survey of western music?
Girl: It was terrible: someone would always find a way to bring up gender issues. I mean, I hate to break it to you, but eighteenth century tonal music doesn’t give a shit about your vagina.

Sarah Lawrence College
Bronxville, New York

Posted on January 7, 2022
Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Gender issues, Girls, Gripes, Music, New York, Questions, Students, Teachers, Vagina, Words

Still Doesn't Explain How the Entire Cast Fit on the Set Of Roseanne

Brunette: I don't think dinosaurs were ever real.
Blonde: Why is that?
Brunette: If they were really that big, only like ten could fit on earth. They wouldn't even be able to walk around much.
Blonde: Oh, you're probably right. I've never thought about it like that before.

Northern Michigan University

Posted on January 3, 2022
Animals, Colleges & Universities, Default, Girls, Michigan, Questions, Stupidity

We Recommend Turning Your Monitor and Playing a Lot of FreeCell

Female suit to another: So…how do we do things that make it look like we're doing things?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/339378523/have-you-ever-worked-for-the-government.html

Overheard by: corporate America, we have a problem

Posted on December 30, 2021
Default, Office politics, Overheard in Minneapolis, Questions, Suits, Women

Questions