Disgruntled freshman girl #1: Ugh, I hate that guy. He is like, you know, so… Ugh!
Disgruntled freshman girl #2: I know, right?
Rude sophomore guy, interrupting: Oh, me and him? We're like porn buddies!
(awkward silence from girls)
Rude sophomore guy: What? That was like, before.
Cainta
Rizal
Philippines
Overheard by: happened to be eating lunch
Female student, having side conversation: I'm always getting hit by pianos!
Columbia College
Chicago, Illinois
Male bar patron #1: Matt's just too much, man.
Male bar patron #2: I can't take that much manhood.
(awkward pause)
Male bar patron #3: I'm sore.
The Sevens
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Bar Patron
Lady to guy eating a sub: But both mine and his parents' are life-sized!
Sub Factory
Tempe, Arizona
Guy to girl: This is gonna sound weird, but spread your legs!
Las Vegas, Nevada
Chick on cell phone: My roommate was rolling a lint roller all over her head for like ten minutes and finally I was like: “What the fuck are you doing? You’re gonna pull all your hair out!” … Haha yeah… She threatened to kill me if I asked her anymore questions… She probably watches me sleep.
UB Bus
Buffalo, New York
Sorority girl, walking from class with a friend: Yeah, so they made us cook naked.
Kent State University
Kent, Ohio
Black woman in the ER on cell: You killed him? What do you mean you “killed him”?
Chestnut Hill Hospital
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Man: There are mutes dying all over the world, and they can't say anything! So here I am…
Providence, Rhode Island
