That's What You Said About the Dentist's Chair!

Middle aged woman #1: I want to see the flag exhibit.
Middle aged woman #2: Me too! I hear it's just like Space Mountain.

Smithsonian National Museum of American History
Washington, DC

Posted on November 19, 2019
Compare and contrast, Pop culture, Washington, DC, Wishes, Women

Seriously, Just Kill Us Now

Pre-cal teacher to apathetic senior students: Now we're getting into the fun stuff–exponential growth of fruit flies!

Prattville, Alabama

Overheard by: Lindsey

Posted on November 14, 2019
Alabama, Compare and contrast, Default, Education, Fruit, Teachers, Weirdness

And I Need Lipstick for Medicinal Purposes

College girl, handing heavy basket to boyfriend: I’m all for feminism, but I don’t like carrying heavy things.

Target
Towson, Maryland

Overheard by: Kay-ren

Posted on November 12, 2019
Compare and contrast, Gender issues, Girls, Maryland, Offers and requests, Philosophy, Sorority types, Stores

And Then There's the Peeing in My Closet

Sit-ups guy to older dude: Oh, hey there, Bob.
Older dude: You know, every time I see you I think of my dog.
Sit-ups guy: Oh? Why's that?
Older dude: I keep trying to get him to kneel. (walks away)

Z-Center, MIT
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Overheard by: MaybeHisNameIsNeal

Posted on November 10, 2019
Animals, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Massachusetts, Questions, Students

At Least Take a Bite of This Apple

Boy: I believe in waiting until marriage.
Girl: That’s funny, cause I believe in you fucking my brains out.

Bryn Mawr College
Pennsylvania

Posted on November 8, 2019
Bimbettes, Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Comebacks, Compare and contrast, Etiquette, Girls, Guys, Pennsylvania, Relationships, Religion, Religious fanatics, Sex, Students, Wishes, Yeahhh, college!

She Wasn't Well Bread

Drunk guy to friend: I didn't respect her because she didn't respect the sandwich.

Scooter's Bar
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Kate

Posted on October 31, 2019
Bars & Clubs, Compare and contrast, Default, Drunks, Food, Guys, Oregon, Relationships

NewsFlash: “Your Mom” Replaces “That's What She Said” As Laziest Insult

Girl: I think the live-action of GTO is so much better.
Guy: I think the live action of your mom is so much better.

Norristown, Pennsylvania

Posted on October 26, 2019
Compare and contrast, Default, Family ties, Girls, Guys, Insults, Pennsylvania, Pop culture, TV shows

Also, He's a Cocker Spaniel.

Pilot, on PA system, after a slightly bumpy landing: Ladies and gentlemen, that landing was not me or the plane. That was our co-pilot–he's required to complete one landing a month. And he blew it. Welcome to Chicago.

Airport
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Nonplussed Passenger

Posted on October 23, 2019
Compare and contrast, Illinois, Pilots, Plane, Stupidity

Whoa, Is My Face Red

Jock: Dude, I went to our professor's office yesterday, and you know what? She has a giant bottle of lube just sitting there on her desk!
(pause)
Friend: You jackass! That's hand sanitizer on her desk, not lube!

University of Colorado

Overheard by: I keep the lube in the drawer

Posted on October 21, 2019
Colleges & Universities, Colorado, Compare and contrast, Jocks, Sex, Stupidity

Why Lightbulb-Shaped Buttplugs Exist.

Punk girl: A lamp?
Punk guy: While it was still on.
Punk girl: Didn't that like…burn the colon?
Punk guy: Apparently it wasn't on at first. Someone decided to plug it in as a joke.
Punk girl, giggling: Oh my god…what happened with that?
Punk guy: I don't know–all I know is that it involved the hospital.

California

Posted on October 21, 2019
Ass, California, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Guys, Punks, Questions, Weirdness

Compare and contrast