Ginger and Craig Live in a Candy House and Have Diabetes

Young woman #1: You know, Ginger and Craig, with the breadcrumbs and all that.
Young woman #2: You mean Hansel and Gretel!?
Young woman #1: Oh. Yeah, them.
Young woman #2: Wow.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Posted on October 21, 2020
Default, Friends, Memory lane, Names, Pennsylvania, Stupidity, Women

Like Having Grandma Sit on Your Face

Hostess describing rose and black lady tea combo: Smells like rose, tastes like lady.

Beijing
China

Posted on October 20, 2020
China, Default, Food, Language barrier, Sensory experiences, Women, Words

Without Us, There'd Be No MTV.

Physics professor: Where are all the physicists? Eh, we're all cab drivers, drug addicts and musicians.

Cupertino, California

Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl loves physics

Posted on October 19, 2020
California, Default, Drugs, Offers and requests, Questions, Teachers

We'd Hate to Hear Him in Bed

Pilot over intercom after rough landing: Whooaa, Nessie! (makes galloping sound) Easy, girl! (makes baaing sound) Whoops, wrong animal.

Houston, Texas

Overheard by: kayla

Posted on October 19, 2020
Airports & flights, Animals, Default, Pilots, Public transportation, Texas, Weirdness

…Which I Use for My Other Job

(on a bus passing city jail)
Mom: Look kids… that's where daddy is.
(pause)
Mom: I can give you a haircut.
Man: I like the lady who does my hair, she has good mirrors so I can see the back of my head.
Mom: I've got good mirrors. I've got mirrors on the ceiling, too.

Bus
Omaha, Nebraska

Posted on October 18, 2020
Bus, Default, Family ties, Guys, Jobs & Careers, Moms, Nebraska, Weirdness

In the Meantime, Would You Like to Take My Card?

Wildly bearded hobo riding rusty bicycle and wearing only one shoe and parachute pants: Why, hello miss. Would you be interested in entering into a mutually beneficial body massage arrangement?
Surprised, redheaded woman: Uhhhhh, not today, thank you.
Hobo: I'll try back later.

Queen West
Toronto
Canadia

Posted on October 17, 2020
Body parts, Canadia, Default, Hobos, Offers and requests, Questions, Weirdness, Women

Just When Race Relations Were Improving in Boston

White tourist: I’m really sorry — I don’t have any change. If I did, I’d give you some, but I don’t, so… sorry. Good luck with everything…
Black dude: Cracka, I’m ain’t homeless!

Hynes Convention Center subway stop
Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on October 15, 2020
Black people, Comebacks, Default, Feelings, Massachusetts, Public transportation, Tourists, Whiteys

The Keebler Elves Say They Need the Yeast

Drunk girl to drunk friend: Unless you live in my vagina, you wouldn't know!

Springfield, Illinois

Overheard by: Random Bar Guy

Posted on October 14, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Drunks, Girls, Vagina, Weirdness

Well, I Got a Lap Dance in the Buffet Line

Girl one: Smell my face. Smell right here. Doesn’t it smell great? The stripper I got a lap dance from was wearing great perfume.
Girl two: It smells like pickles.

Toby Keith’s Restaurant
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: At least it doesn’t smell like tuna

Posted on October 13, 2020
Compare and contrast, Dancing, Default, Food, Girls, Nevada, Restaurants, Sensory experiences, Sexuality

Or Who You Are, Really

Student librarian on cell: Hey…who is this? Bill from architecture? Well, yeah, I remember writing my name on your arm, but I like don't remember why.

Music Library, Catholic University
Washington, DC

Overheard by: So much for quiet in the library…

Posted on October 12, 2020
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Memory lane, Names, On the phone, Questions, Students, Washington, DC

Default