You're Not Butch Enough for Us, Pal

Hobo to girls: Oh, ladies, I like the way your skirts move. (girls look disgusted) Sorry, I can't help it if I'm a lesbian.

Olympia, Washington

Overheard by: Sticking with pants

Posted on April 30, 2019
Clothes, Default, Hobos, Sexuality, Washington, Weirdness

…Full Of Heroin?

Middle-aged black woman to husband: Baby, you remember that time I shot you?

CVS
Indianapolis, Indiana

Posted on April 29, 2019
Crimes, Default, Hubbies, Memory lane, Questions, Relationships, Stores, Thugs, Violence, Women

See the Truth in the Morning and Die Happy That Night

Old man in hospital bed, to family: I've said it once, and I'll say it again. Tigers are the sharks of the land!

Poughkeepsie, New York

Posted on April 25, 2019
Animals, Compare and contrast, Default, New York, Old folks, Philosophy

You Never Did That When We Were Together, Either

Young guy on cell: You got a bikini wax?… Really?… How come you never did that when we were together?… Oh, so you’re a woman now?

7-Eleven
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia

Posted on April 24, 2019
Canadia, Default, Gender issues, Guys, Hair, On the phone, Questions, Relationships, Sexuality, Stores, Weirdness

Chad and Jeremy Break Up

Gay guy #1, walking down the street: Oh, this place is cute. Your parents should stay here when they visit.
Gay guy #2: That's a funeral home.

Market Street
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Ray

Posted on April 23, 2019
Compliments, Death & dying, Default, Family ties, Guys, Queers, Relationships, San Francisco, Weirdness

Just When You Thought American Schools Were the Worst…

Student, talking about fur coat made out of Bobcat: Excuse me, what's a Bobcat?
Teacher: Some kind of tractor.

Australia

Overheard by: xmeagan

Posted on April 20, 2019
Australia, Default, Education, Questions, Students, Stupidity, Teachers, Words

Cats Are Hypersensitive to Comma Faults

Boy: So why did you move here?
Girl: I was gonna go to art school and then I wrote this big essay and my cat shit on it.
Boy: Literally shit on it?
Girl: Yeah, I took it as a sign.

18 Bus
Seattle, Washington

Posted on April 18, 2019
Animals, Bus, Default, Education, Feelings, Friends, Girls, Guys, Poop, Questions, Washington

Now We Can't Even Keep Madonna

British theater professor: Well, you know Hong Kong used to belong to Britain. (angrily) Everything used to belong to Britain.

Theater Class, UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Chanimal

Posted on April 17, 2019
Class, Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Geography, History, Massachusetts, Politics, Teachers

Rhino Chicks Never Give Me the Time Of Day

Man #1, watching rhino: Damn, it's huge.
Man #2: Lucky bastard.

San Diego Zoo
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Nikki

Posted on April 15, 2019
Animals, California, Compliments, Default, Guys, Tourist attractions, Weirdness

That's What the Overhead Lights Are For

Flight attendant (on PA): Chances are they're all middle seats. Find the one with the most attractive people, and take it.

Southwest Flight over California

Overheard by: Armen

Posted on April 12, 2019
Advice, Airports & flights, Beauty, California, Default, Flight attendants, Public transportation

Default