Old guy to friend: He got a new girl who works in the sex industry… and you know his fantasy has always been two women. I told him it'd never happen, but apparently it did. His girl has a friend who was willing to play along…
Holland, Michigan
Old guy to friend: He got a new girl who works in the sex industry… and you know his fantasy has always been two women. I told him it'd never happen, but apparently it did. His girl has a friend who was willing to play along…
Holland, Michigan
Hot chick to another: You look so good! Guys will be jerking off on you tonight!
Vallejo Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ladle
Cute girl to friend: But I don't want a booty call! (pause) But the message of the notebook made me realize how important they are.
Cornell University
Ithaca, New York
Overheard by: Anna
Guy from inside Port-A-Potty: Oh, shit, I just dropped my BlackBerry in there!
Friend: Oh, man, what are you gonna do?!
Guy: Well, somebody’s got to stick their hand in there!
Dude waiting in line: I think I’ll use the other one. I don’t want to be the first person to piss on your BlackBerry.
Rock the Farm Benefit
East Hampton, New York
Woman at table dining with friend: I mean, I love infectious diseases, don’t get me wrong, but that’s not my life.
Red Restaurant
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: kyndgrrl
Stoner #1: The other day I saw this homeless guy, and I felt bad, and I had just bought a stack, so I gave him some weed. He was like: “Thank you very much.”
Stoner #2: Are you serious?
Stoner #1: Yeah. I don’t care what anybody says, that was the most down shit ever. I fucking love bums.
Chino, California
Girl: I told him I didn't dance, because I didn't want to dance with him, but all these other guys asked me if I wanted to dance and I had to say no because I told him I didn't dance, but I really wanted to dance. So we have to go, so that I can dance.
Friend: So, did you dance with him?
Pasadena, California
Overheard by: needs new friends
Curious friend: Doesn't your mouth get tired?
Small Asian girl: That's what my hands are for!
Curious friend: Don't your arms get tired?!
Small Asian girl: That's what my mouth is for!
Curious friend: What do you do when both get tired?
Small Asian girl: Oh, that's when he puts it in my butt.
Hoboken, New Jersey
Girl to friend, after unsuccessfully trying to open locked front doors: Maybe they'll let us in if we bang hard enough.
High School
San Francisco, California