Friends

Gay man to friend: He's not hot enough to have AIDS!

Cleveland, Ohio

Overheard by: Rachel Kaiser

(blind shuts in lounge area, blocking really bright sunshine, everybody quickly looks up)
Hot Chinese girl: Hey!
Friend: And finally they drop the blinds. My eyes were starting to hurt.
Hot Chinese girl: But I like the sunshine! It's so bright and warm and it emphasizes my boobs by casting shadows on my chest!

University of Toronto
Canadia

Guy: Didn’t you have a friend who lost her virginity to her shoe?
Green haired girl: Yeah. She fell on her foot and ruptured it or something. Like riding a horse.
Pink haired girl: What the fuck?
Guy: Told you!
Green haired girl: I felt bad when she told us because I was the only one busting up laughing.

California

Whiny girl to female friend, showing a polka-dotted bra: Come on! I'm trying to show you my boobs!
Boy, lifting his shirt: The only boobs she wants to see are mine!

Eugene, Oregon

Girl, returning from holidays in America: So yeah, I got put in actual jail.
Friend: For drinking on the beach?
Girl: Yup, got the orange jumpsuit and all.
Friend: Did you get to keep it?
Girl: I didn't like to ask, to be honest. Would've been a savage souvenir, though.

UCC Campus
Ireland

20-something to friend: I can't believe you asked if he was the handjob guy!

Norman, Oklahoma

Good looking dude, walking up to friend: Cunnilingus!
Good looking friend: And cunnilingus to you too.

Wits University
Johannesburg
South Africa

Girl: The first Pokemon movie was really sad.
Guy #1: Oh, yeah! It made me cry.
Girl: I couldn’t believe when Pikachu almost died…
Guy #2: Have you guys seen Pokemon porn?
Girl: Okay, let’s just stop right there.
Guy #2: No, it’s crazy. You know Misty? She’ll do like anything!

Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Claire

Queer: Oh my god, look, it’s Mary. Mary! Maaary!
Mary: Heyyy, bitches! What’s going on?
Queer: Did he love it, Mary? Did he absolutely love it? Where’s Basil? Where is Basil, Mary?
Mary: He’s in the bag, baby, he’s in the bag.

Union Station
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Aly

College burnout: It has a soft and creamy center!
Friend, looking at computer: I still don't like him.

Thibodaux, Louisiana

Overheard by: Batpam