Only If Mom Stops Using the Cucumber For…You Know.

Father to four-year-old: Stop spanking the eggplant!

Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Kay

Posted on December 23, 2008
Dads, Default, Fruit, Offers and requests, Oregon, Violence, Weirdness

They Keep a Lot on the Down Low

Guy: I have a lot of respect for icebergs. They're not trying to show off or anything.

http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2008/09/25/bill-oreilly-claims-arctic-breaking-up-just-for-the-hell-of-it/

Overheard by: aylmer

Posted on December 22, 2008
Default, Feelings, Geography, Guys, Overheard at McGill, Weirdness

Now He'll Turn This Into a Song and Record It in Eight Languages

Woman (talking on the phone about a friend): She's happy as a clam since she had her uterus removed…
Husband (in the background): Happy as a clam without a uterus.
Woman: (glaring at him, keeps talking)
Husband: Happy as a clam without a uterus!

Dresden, New York

Overheard by: Rachel Bz.

Posted on December 20, 2008
Compare and contrast, Couples, Default, Guys, Happiness, Health & Hygiene, New York, Uterus, Weirdness, Women, Words

No Wonder King Cole Isn't a Merry Old Soul Anymore

Preppy college girl to friend: She was the girl who would go down on him while lighting his bowl. She was the perfect girl for him. It's too bad she went crazy, they would have been so happy together!

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/411972898/yeah-she-sounds-irreplaceable.html

Overheard by: burrhead.

Posted on December 19, 2008
BJs, Compare and contrast, Default, Friends, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Overheard in Minneapolis, Preppies, Relationships, Weirdness

Okay, See Ya Later!

Porn-'stached scuzzball: I mean, if you ever, like, masturbated, you'd know that smell.

Robinson, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: And I Go To College With You??

Posted on December 19, 2008
Default, Etiquette, Guys, Masturbation, Pennsylvania, Sensory experiences, Weirdness

Eh, My Sister Does the Same Thing

Biology professor: And don't play frisbee with a beluga whale. They've been known to masturbate with them.

University of Mississippi

Posted on December 19, 2008
Advice, Animals, Colleges & Universities, Default, Masturbation, Mississippi, Teachers, Weirdness

But Myth Won't Even Let Him Buy It a Drink

Professor: We know CS Lewis likes myth. We know Lewis loves myth. We know he wants myth's babies.

Tallahassee, Florida

Overheard by: Jessica

Posted on December 18, 2008
Books, Default, Feelings, Florida, Kids, Teachers, Weirdness

I Know What You Did Last Sundae Was an Instant Box Office Smash

Little girl: I don't want ice cream, daddy. Know why, daddy? (in a demonic voice) Because it's evil!

Grinnell, Iowa

Overheard by: Jake

Posted on December 17, 2008
Default, Evil, Food, Girls, Iowa, Kids, Questions, Weirdness, Wishes

Nah, They Know the Pecking Order

Bookseller to pregnant coworker: Aren't you worried there will be jealousy between the chickens and your unborn child?

Barnes & Noble
Augusta, Maine

Overheard by: Just browsing

Posted on December 16, 2008
Birds, Customers, Default, Feelings, Kids, Maine, Questions, Stores, Weirdness

Whereas the Middle Ages Were More Like Getting Ear-Fucked Repeatedly

Girl on train helping her friend study: Think of a baby crawling back into the vagina and popping out again. That's the renaissance.

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Sitting in front of them for an hour on the train

Posted on December 15, 2008
Advice, Birthing, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, History, Illinois, Train, Weirdness

Weirdness

No Wonder King Cole Isn't a Merry Old Soul Anymore