Girl to pregnant friend: You're just like Mary, mother of Jesus…except she knew who the father was.
Toronto
Canadia
Girl to pregnant friend: You're just like Mary, mother of Jesus…except she knew who the father was.
Toronto
Canadia
Female English professor on the first day of class: So tell me as much about me as you can by my appearance. What kind of person do you think I am?
Student: I think you were probably a wild teenager. You've got a tattoo and a tongue piercing.
Female English professor (chuckling): I've got more tattoos and piercings than you care to know about.
Community College
Elizabethtown, Kentucky
Overheard by: Chelsea
Korean queer, smoking: I heard oral sex gives you more throat cancer than cigarettes.
Dida’s Bar
Sao Paulo
Brazil
Woman: Sorry, I have to pay in singles.
Cashier: That's okay, people do all the time. (asking innocently) Are you a waitress?
Woman: No, honey. My career is a little less wholesome than that.
Cashier: (stutters and looks at her screen) Alright then, your total is $27.45.
Kroger
Cincinnati, Ohio
Guy: Yeah, it’s like that one time we ended up at the homosexual movie theater.
Girl: They have gay movie theaters?
Guy: Yeah, it’s called, like… Homoplex or something.
Girl: We don’t even have those in Boston.
Diner
St. Louis, Missouri
College professor: Are you mocking my forest? My forest could kick your forest's butt any day. Bring your forest on!
(later)
College professor: I can see my forest from the window in my office. Do you have an office you can see your forest from?
Keuka College
New York
Overheard by: Rachel Bz.
Teenage girl on bus: Oh, fuck. What is this world coming to? It's like it gets worse and worse.
Teenage guy sitting beside her: What? No. This wouldn't be the worst thing that's happened. Bad things happen all the time. Think about worse things going on right now, or that have been going on, for like, forever.
Teenage girl: It feels like it's getting worse, though.
Teenage guy: But it's not, though.
Teenage girl: Yeah, but, these bad things keep happening. It always keeps happening.
(pause)
Teenage guy: I wanna go see Watchmen.
Teenage girl: Don't, I heard it's not that good.
Bus
Ontario
Canadia
Fag hag, about friend's boyfriend: Well, at least he has a nice guitar.
Fag: No one notices a guy's guitar on the first date…except maybe you.
Fag hag: Hey, at least someone fingered my g-string recently.
Jacksonville, Florida
Overheard by: Ari
20-something foreigner: The Democrats and Republicans… It's like the difference between safe sex and unsafe sex.
Taverna
Athens
Greece
Overheard by: sarah
Little girl: You don’t like me!
Mother: If I didn’t like you, I’d throw you in the dumpster.
North Branford, Connecticut
