Guy, mournfully: And then I go in and Colin is sitting there, taking shots of vodka by himself, in that pink dress…
Girl, nonplussed: Again?
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: archie
Guy, mournfully: And then I go in and Colin is sitting there, taking shots of vodka by himself, in that pink dress…
Girl, nonplussed: Again?
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: archie
Girl: I thought dinosaurs were a fairy tale.
Junior High Science Class
El Paso, Texas
Old lady to friend: I’ve been praying for the strength to be friendly with Nicole*, but she makes it so difficult! Goddamit, I am going to heaven, so either she has to shape up soon or I have to try not to die!
San Jose, California
Hipster college dude: You mean you had anal?
Hipster college chick: Well, more like mental anal.
Hipster college dude: Mental anal. Hmmm, let me think on that a spell.
UNM Campus
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Overheard by: klutch
Professor: The dew line -by the way, any Rush fans in here?
(three or four raise hands in a class of 200)
Professor: Only three? That’s a sad state of affairs.
Canadian History Lecture
University of Toronto
Canadia
Boyfriend: I only cheated on you with one girl but you cheated on me with three guys… at the same time!
Ohio State University
Overheard by: JooSki
Loud white ghetto guy on cell: Dude, I’m at Target. They don’t got nothing here! Man, I should have gone to Wal-Mart. (pause) Oh, here’s a sweet knife. Maybe I’ll buy that for shits and giggles.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/298723208/this-guy-knows-how-to-have-fun.html
Overheard by: gee, you have to wonder what this guy does with his free time…
Customer (ordering a birthday cake for his wife): Can you put “You’re better lookin’ than your twin sister” on it?
Alpine Bakery
Concord, California
Religious nut: Go back to the kitchen!
Gay girl #1: We do it in the kitchen!
Gay girl #2: Oh yeah. That’s the day we realized our dishwasher had wheels.
Pride Parade
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Overheard by: Cade
Teenage girl on cell: I hung out with that camel.
Eagle, Idaho
Overheard by: Giles