Translation: He's Been Too Happy Lately

Son: Mommy, why are you going through daddy's phone?
Mother: Because I love him!

Panera
Howell, New Jersey

Posted on March 27, 2016
Cell phones, Family ties, Feelings, Infidelity, Kids, Moms, New Jersey, Questions

That's What You Said When You Gave Him Syphilis

Girl on phone: He says that we can't be together because it bothers him that we're cousins, and we were intimate. I think it's because doctors are more sensitive to that kind of thing than the rest of us.

Train, New Jersey

Overheard by: NoNoK

Posted on March 13, 2016
Default, Family ties, Feelings, Girls, New Jersey, On the phone, Sexuality, Train

My Dad Wants to See Me ASAP

30-something druggie girl: I know my dad's looking down at me, helping me and shit. That's how I got my handbag back.
30-something druggie guy: Yeah? For fuckin serious?
30-something druggie girl: Yeah! I feel like he's telling me shit sometimes. Sometimes I reckon he wants me to stop taking the pills and the smack, but then I'm like, “Nah, that's just the drugs talking.”

Train
Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: XPIOTOS

Posted on March 13, 2016
Australia, Default, Druggies, Drugs, Family ties, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Poop, Questions, Train

Luckily So Many Other Things Taste Like Them

College girl: Just think about all the chickens that get killed every day, like just by McDonald’s.
Friend: Yeah, but you know… I don’t really care.
College girl: Oh no, I don’t care about them either, I’m just scared they’re gonna run out of chickens.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Curlee

Posted on March 11, 2016
Animals, Fears, Feelings, Food, Friends, Massachusetts, Sorority types

Isn't Tennessee Enough?

American girl: I get really emotional when I'm in church. I feel like I don't deserve to be there.
Brazilian girl: That's because you deserve to be in prison.

Nashville, Tennessee

Posted on March 9, 2016
Compare and contrast, Crimes, Feelings, Girls, Religion, Tennessee

But It Was Actually the Four Horsemen and Their Nasty, Old Apocalypse

Professor: I thought it was an “Oh my god, ponies!” moment.

Christopher Newport University
Newport News, Virginia

Overheard by: It had to be…

Posted on March 6, 2016
Animals, Colleges & Universities, Default, Feelings, Names, Teachers, Virginia, Words

No More Gene Kelly Movies for You, Young Man

Mom, walking in the rain: This is not good.
Four-year-old son: It’s nice!
Mom: It is not nice, what the hell?!

Springfield, Massachusetts

Posted on February 23, 2016
Compare and contrast, Feelings, Gripes, Guys, Kids, Massachusetts, Moms, Sensory experiences

They're Always Handy When You Can't Find a Bottle Opener

Girl: So what do you think about Daniel getting a makeover, Patrick?
Guy: I dig razor-sharp nipples.

Salt Lake City, Utah

Overheard by: Ben

Posted on February 20, 2016
Default, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Nipples, Questions, Utah

Dental Orgasms Are the Norm in Canadia

Kindly older woman on cell: No, no, no, ask him to be gentle, tell him it's your first time…it's beautiful. You're going to love it, Caroline. Okay, love you! Bye!

Vancouver
Canadia

Overheard by: Emma Middleton

Posted on February 15, 2016
Advice, Canadia, Compliments, Default, Feelings, Offers and requests, Old folks, Women

But How Do You Feel About It?

Gossip girl #1: Oh my god! Did I tell you that I got accepted for my exchange to Paris next year? I'm going second semester.
Gossip girl #2: Oh my god! That's amazing!
Gossip girl #1: Yeah, I'm really excited.
Gossip girl #2: That's so exciting!
Gossip girl #1: Yeah, it's gonna be amazing.
Gossip girl #2: That is so amazing.
Gossip girl #1: Yeah, I'm super excited!
Gossip girl #2: That is just so exciting!

VIA Train
Montreal to Toronto

Overheard by: The zoe

Posted on February 14, 2016
Canadia, Default, Education, Feelings, Geography, Girls, Questions, Train, Words

Feelings