And No Finger-Cymbals for You Tonight.

Screaming seven-year-old on the ground: But I want to sing! I want to sing now!
Patient but angry mom: Well, you should have thought about that before. It’s too late. Now get your kazoo and get in the car.

Easley High
Easley, South Carolina

Posted on January 2, 2026
Default, Gripes, Guys, Kids, Moms, Singing, South Dakota, Wishes

And Had a Dream About It.

Thug on cell: Fuck off, man. Don’t even try arguing with me. I’m a fucking expert on this shit. I wikipedia-ed it last night.

Carousel Mall
Syracuse, New York

Posted on December 31, 2025
Advice, Bragging, Default, Etiquette, Guys, Insults, Internet, Malls, New York, On the phone, Thugs

At Least He’s Stopped Talking About His Turds.

Bitter guy: Girls don’t care about men, so I can’t relate to them. And men only care about sports, food, video games, and women. I do like to eat, but I hate women. I don’t like sports at all, and I’m soooo good at video games that other people can’t play with me because I am just too awesome.
Girl sitting at the table with him: Yeah…

University of Massachusetts
Amherst, Massachusetts

Posted on December 30, 2025
Bragging, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Dorks, Geeks & Nerds, Etiquette, Feelings, Gender issues, Girls, Guys, Idiots, Massachusetts, Pride, Sexuality, Stupidity, Weirdness

Good to Meet a Gentleman Of the Old School

Dude: Hey I’m Eddie*.
Chick: Yeah, I know. I’m Lauren*. We’ve met before.
Dude: Oh. Yeah. Well I just thought we should know each other’s name since we’re talking about anal.

The Beta Bar
Tallahassee, Florida

Overheard by: just here for the show

Posted on December 29, 2025
Backdoor, Bars & Clubs, Chicks, Default, Etiquette, Florida, Guys, Names, Relationships

What’s This Irrational Fear of Joan of Arc?

Man on cell: I wouldn’t worry about her though, she’s dead.

Newark airport
Newark, New Jersey

Overheard by: catherine

Posted on December 29, 2025
Advice, Airports & flights, Death & dying, Default, Etiquette, Feelings, Guys, New Jersey, On the phone

Gosh, That Was a Fun Baptism.

Big Italian guy holding a putter: Man, the last time I had one of these was to beat someone up!

Lumberjack Mini Golf
Lake George, New York

Overheard by: Jessica

Posted on December 29, 2025
Bragging, Compare and contrast, Default, Foreigners, Guys, New York, Violence, Weirdness

The French: “We’re on Your Side?”

Professor: And the French, they?re only worth 2/3 of a person because, well, they?re on our side, but they don?t fight well.

http://www.overheardatumbc.com

Posted on December 27, 2025
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Education, Geography, Guys, History, Insults, Overheard at UMBC, Politics, Teachers

Might Want to Start Off with “I’m Straight.”

Girl: Look, you have to tell her.
Guy: I can’t tell her! I’ve kept this for so long!
Girl: If she really loves you that much she’ll understand.
Guy: How can I tell the girl that I love that I don’t like musicals?!

Bruin Walk, UCLA
California

Overheard by: if that’s the worst thing in your relationship…