White construction worker: What was the name of Speedy Gonzales’ cousin? The slow one…
Mexican construction worker: Why?
White construction worker: Because I want to start calling you that…
Hamilton Street
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/03/too-stupid-to-be-racist.html
Overheard by: slowpoke rodriguez
Boy #1: Are you reading fuckin’ SkyMall?
Boy #2: Yeah. It’s actually pretty cool…
Boy #1: Faggot.
Logan Airport
Boston, Massachusetts
Screaming hobo: Your mouth is nasty! Your mouth is nasty, man! Your mouth is nastier than my asshole!
Shattuck Avenue and Bancroft Way
Berkeley, California
Overheard by: Kaitlen
Guy to girlfriend: You know, I got the crabs.
Girlfriend: Emm… okay.
Guy: Guess what?
Girlfriend: What?
Guy: You got 'em too, stupid!
San Francisco, California
Old redneck to wife: I don't need no damn misogynist. I done tried that, and it didn't help.
Greenville, South Carolina
Guy #1: So, ‘viticulture’ — that’s Latin, right?
Guy #2: Well, Latin is a dead language, so it doesn’t count.
Guy #3: You’re a dead language.
Guy #4: Your mother’s a whore.
Culinary Institute of America
Hyde Park, New York
Overheard by: just a student
Dude #1: So then I was like, “take that back, you bitch!”
Dude #2: Whoa man, then what happened?
Dude #1: She bent over, and then it hit her that I wasn't trying to bone her doggy style. I dumped her two minutes later.
Dude #2: Haha, yeah! That's my sister for you!
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Stephanie C.
Middle aged tourist with shopping bags moving towards a small puppy: Well, my oh my, aren't you the sweetest looking thing in the world!
Puppy: (barks)
Middle aged tourist: Oh, go fuck yourself!
Bangkok
Thailand
Overheard by: Adair
Student: Yeah, she said ‘good luck’ to me. [Friend rolls eyes and shakes head.] I know. It’s the University of Toronto — she doesn’t mean ‘good luck.’ What she really means is ‘I hope you choke on a toothpick and die so I can get your spot in the program.’
Friend, sighing: It really is a shame this school has to be so competitive… How’d you do on that last test?
University of Toronto
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: A+
