Old Midwestern lady #1: All these kids bringing their videos games everywhere!
Old Midwestern lady #2: It's depressing! My son-in-law brings his laptop everywhere. Always on the internet.
Old Midwestern lady #1: Is he using one of those blueberries? Or blackpods?
Old Midwestern lady #2: I don't know, I'm just glad I'm old.
Newark, New Jersey
Overheard by: thankfully on a different flight
Guy: Do you know what “felching” is?
Girl: No… Is it tasty?
New Jersey
Drunk guy: I'm so happy I'm a guy. I don't have to wipe after I pee.
Tipsy girl: You should really wipe if you want Lisa* to suck your dick.
Bayonne, New Jersey
Girl: Good morning, Rob*.
Guy, gasping: Your voice changed! It's deeper!
Girl: Oh. This is my morning voice. It's how I sound in the morning.
Guy: You're not cute anymore!
Saint Peter's College
New Jersey
Jeff: If I was gay I would whip out my dick right now… which I'm about to do.
Plainsboro, New Jersey
Overheard by: Scott
Girl #1: Hey, let's go to The Gap, they have short pants there.
Girl #2, pissed off: Shut the fuck up! I hate you.
Mall
Northern New Jersey
Woman in nurse scrubs: It's like my brother says, “bread is merely a vehicle for butter to enter the body”.
Italian Restaurant
Toms River, New Jersey
Guy: Hey, come sit over here.
Girl, taking seat: Why?
Guy: I farted.
Girl, remaining in seat: Oh, I don't care.
Guy: Goddamn it! Why are the girls we hang out with so cool?
Jersey City, New Jersey
Mother to sixteen year-old in booty shorts and Uggs: You can be a geisha girl! It goes all the way down to the floor!
Halloween Store
New Jersey
Guy: Do you know how I know you were singing correctly?
Girl: You saw me sucking in my stomach?
Guy: No. When you started spitting at me!
Girl: I can't help that I have great diction!
Saint Peter's College
New Jersey
