Frat boy to others: So you masturbate in a cup, right? Then you freeze it, and in the morning mix it with your protein powder.
George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia
Overheard by: red
Frat boy to others: So you masturbate in a cup, right? Then you freeze it, and in the morning mix it with your protein powder.
George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia
Overheard by: red
Cute chick in line: Oh! I want Haribo gummi bears! I need a snack to study effectively. There are lots of things I don't do effectively without snacking.
Boyfriend: Maybe you should try snacking next time we have sex. You know, maybe a little popcorn…a candy bar…
Cute chick: Are you saying my sex isn't effective? Well, maybe there won't be a next time.
Boyfriend: You know, you're not responding very well to constructive criticism. The solution is to keep trying, not to give up.
CVS
University City, Philadelphia
Overheard by: justtryingtowaitinline
Biology professor: And don't play frisbee with a beluga whale. They've been known to masturbate with them.
University of Mississippi
Girl on train helping her friend study: Think of a baby crawling back into the vagina and popping out again. That's the renaissance.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Sitting in front of them for an hour on the train
Construction worker #1, with southern drawl, on speakerphone: Yeah, then we all woke up wearing leotards. Looked like goddamn ballerinas.
Construction worker #2: I don't think I'd tell that story.
http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/10/men-men-men-manly-men-men-men.html
Overheard by: Ian
Foreign professor: If I would be you, I would cheat.
Western Kentucky University
(a group of people are standing on the steps of the station, singing about Christianity)
Man, sprinting across the road: Run for your lives! He's preaching Jesus!
Flinders Street Station
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Skeeta
Girl #1: I wonder if there are exercises to strengthen that.
Girl #2: I know. I tried to look into it once because I can't go down that far without gagging. Is that weird? I want skill tips.
Girl #1: I just use my hand a lot so I don't have to skit it down far.
Girl #2: Okay, so I think it's because I started out with not a lot of girth, but now guys are like, “you can squeeze harder.” And I'm like, “uuum…are you sure?” I feel like I”m going to break your fucking dick off.
Girl #1: Yeah. It makes it go faster. Dicks are resilient. Get violent.
Madison Children's Museum
Madison, Wisconsin
Woman #1: We went to a club together one time and they were still dating, and he kept trying to kiss me. Well, I refused to. But then my cell phone got stolen and I was mad, so we made out. A lot.
Woman #2: You made out with him because your phone got stolen?
Woman #1: Yeah, basically. I was pissed and trying to have a good night, and he's very attractive. So I was like, “let's go!”
Woman #2: I think you're my hero.
Woman #1: I'm supposed to go to a concert with him next week.
Woman #2: Well, don't lose your wallet, because then you'll have to do him.
Fayetteville, North Carolina
Overheard by: James
Professor: So where else could the US get money for the $700 billion dollar economic bailout other than the American taxpayers?
Student: I think that they should have a bake sale!
Meredith College
Raleigh, North Carolina
Overheard by: Jen
