Chatty chick: … And he called me a drunk! I mean, I am a drunk, but I’m a functional drunk. I told him everyone loves drunks but nobody loves a crackhead… I don’t even care if I get a beer belly! Someone will still love me and rub my beer belly!
22 Fillmore bus
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: melissa
Woman on cell: Bitch, I’m on the train. No, I ain’t ridin’ the bus! Have you seen the buses in this city?! Girl I wouldn’t get on the bus if fucking Harriet Tubman herself was waving a damn flashlight telling me, ‘All clear’!
On the Red Line
Chicago, Illinois
Bimbette: Well, discriminating against the Muslims is different than against, like, the Russians for Hitler and everything.
Archbishop Spalding High School
Severn, Maryland
Overheard by: Wait, is she kidding?
Thug #1: Man, it’s so hard to be in a relationship these days.
Thug #2: Yeah, my relationships die faster than those goldfish you win at a carnival.
Columbus, Ohio
Girl #1: Ew, this sushi is like jizz! Here, eat some so I’m not the only one.
Girl #2: No.
Girl #1: Come on, put it in your mouth. Just taste it. Just a little bit. I don’t want to be the only one!
http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2007/05/01/you-dont-even-want-to-try-the-terriyaki/
Overheard by:
Chick: I’m like Ash from Pokémon, only with Jesus!
Denver, Colorado
Professor: It’s like when you walk into a bathroom with a corpse in the tub and go, ‘Wow, just look at that tile pattern!’
The Evergreen State College
Olympia, Washington
Guy #1: It doesn’t matter if you can pee longer than I can, because I can still drink more than you, so I win overall.
Guy #2: No, peeing longer means I can have sex longer than you.
Guy #1: … Dude, you’re a virgin.
Restroom, Boston University
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: What the…
18-year-old guy #1: Dude, I hate when she sticks her fingers in my ears.
18-year-old guy #2: Wait, so that doesn't turn you on?
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/463269058/shes-just-trying-to-communicate.html
Overheard by: luke.
Girl, looking at books: I love the library! It's like natural Adderall.
Scranton, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: too old for this
