20-something to gay friend: I got stuffed more than a Turducken last night!
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
20-something to gay friend: I got stuffed more than a Turducken last night!
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Woman eating Chinese food to man sitting across: Why don't you try some? It's good.
Man in creepy English accent: No, I get equal or more pleasure watching you eat.
Vancouver
Canadia
Girl: I heard cum was high in protein, but it’s also high in calories.
Guy: Yes… It is also high in Vitamin D, iron, serotonin. Sadly, a woman’s body can hardly produce an equally useful food supplement.
Girl: … It produces babies!
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Drunk guy to two girls: No, really! My ultimate fantasy is to have sex with a ridiculously hot girl while you two are on the futon eating cheetos!
Aburn University
Auburn, Alabama
Guy to girl: I just had this overwhelming urge to drink vinegar, and it worked!
University of New Orleans
Louisiana
Creepster: Given the choice, I’d rather eat a convict than a dolphin.
Kingston, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Dumbfounded
Daughter: Mommy, mommy, that dress makes you look sixteen years younger!
[Later]Daughter: Mommy, if you were stranded in the desert without any water, what would you do?
Mother: [No response].
Daughter: [to little sister] I would eat my own blood.
Old Navy
Promenade Mall, California
Overheard by: Claustrophobic
Girl to male cat: You're so cute! You smell like bacon… but that's okay.
Lewisville, Texas
Stoner #1: … And it burned the whole way down! Seriously, I think my throat hemorrhaged.
Stoner #2: Well at least you didn’t eat nine bowls of pudding.
Kansas State University, Manhattan
Overheard by: I wish I heard the beginning…
Entitled middle-aged anorexic: I'll have the Cobb salad with no croutons, no bacon, no egg, no cheese, and no avocado, with the chicken on a separate plate.
Sheepish waitress: That just leaves lettuce, tomato, and olives. You sure that's all you want, ma'am?
Entitled middle-aged anorexic: I'm sure.
Sheepish waitress: It'd be cheaper to get a side salad and just add chicken.
Entitled middle-aged anorexic: No, I want a Cobb salad.
Sheepish waitress: It would be the same thing without all the toppings.
Entitled middle-aged anorexic: I. Want. A. Cobb. Salad!
Sheepish waitress: Yes, ma'am. What kind of dressing would you like?
Entitled middle-aged anorexic: No dressing, please.
Sheepish waitress: Yes, ma'am.
TGI Friday's
Virginia
