For the Last Time, Destiny, That’s a Penis

Wannabe pickup artist: So, tell me your secrets.
Hot girl: I’m not sure…
Wannabe pickup artist: C’mon.
Hot girl: Okay, but you have to promise not to tell anyone.
Wannabe pickup artist: Fine.
Hot girl: I have a tail.

Albany Park
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Ivan Alfaro

Posted on January 20, 2026
Body parts, Comebacks, Girls, Guys, Illinois, Jerks, Sexuality, Weirdness

She Still Has Traces of a Soul

Cute girl to other cute girls: Yeah, she needs a couple more months in LA until we can be friends with her…

Los Angeles, California

Posted on January 18, 2026
California, Friends, Girls, Offers and requests, Relationships, Stupidity, Teens

Trust Me –That’s My Schtick

Overly optimistic girl: He’s kinda sketchy, but in a nice way.
Passing stranger: Not possible!

Concordia University
Montreal
Canadia

Posted on January 17, 2026
Advice, Canadia, Colleges & Universities, Comebacks, Compare and contrast, Girls, Strangers, Words

Mrs. Claus’s Given Name Was Derek

Little boy to big sister walking behind him: Do you believe in Santa?
Big sister: No! Keep walking.
[big sister shoves him].
Little brother: I heard Santa dislikes girls.

County Fair
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: jake

Posted on January 14, 2026
California, Girls, Kids, Questions, Santa Claus, Siblings, Tourist attractions

In L.A., Teenage Girls Who Don’t Look Good Naked Are Put to Death

Teen girl #1, looking at hot teen guy’s myspace page: He likes me.
Teen girl #2: No, he doesn’t.
Teen girl #1: Yes, he does. He told me I’d look good naked.
Teen girl #2: Well, that’s just a fact. It doesn’t mean he likes you.

Los Angeles, California