Economics professor, suddenly, in a creepy voice: Noooo you may not! Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills! [Continuing in normal voice.] No? Anybody? No? Shame on you all! Just wait a few more years and you’ll get what I’m talking about and you will be so pleased.
Tufts University
Massachusetts
Overheard by: Adrian
(at 4:30 pm)
College girl #1: Well, we could go get dinner now, but it's really early for that.
College guy: Well, it's not too early if you are old.
College girl #2: Yeah, they always start rolling into the restaurant about this time.
College girl #1: Really? I can't wait to be old!
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/363289326/it-happens-earlier-than-you-think.html
Overheard by: I'm not in that big of a rush
50-something guy #1: My new girlfriend is twenty years younger than me.
50-something guy #2: You going to marry her?
50-something guy #1: No. I had that talk with her at the very beginning.
50-something guy #2: You got any nude photos of her on your phone?
Health Club Locker Room
Shawnee Mission, Kansas
Woman to friend: How can she know she's bi at 16? I'm 35 and *I* don't know if *I'm* bi!
Outside Steinmart
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: BecauseISaidSo
Girl #1: Well, you know she gave that guy a blow job when three other people were in the room. Someone was bound to find out.
Girl #2: I’ve never even done it in front of people.
Girl #1: Me either, I’m not that slutty.
Younger girl with them: Oh, guess just me then?
Girl #1: You gave someone a blowjob with people watching?!
Younger girl: Uh, yeah. Back when I was 15 and drunk.
Girl #1: I’m your aunt: should you really have told me that, McSlutty?
Park
San Diego, California
Old guy to total stranger celebrating birthday: When you're young you can make love to six women at a time, but when you're old you can only make love to three women at a time.
Birthday man: Three women is plenty for me.
Old guy: Don't tell anyone I said that to you.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/288392553/your-secret-is-safe-with-us.html
Overheard by: coco
Sorostitute: Oh my god! Your baby is so cute! How old is she?
Single mom: One.
Sorostitute: Oh my god. She is so precious! I love children, I keep the nursery in church and I used to babysit, like, all the time. Do you think I could…
Single mom: No.
Sorostitute: Hold her?
Single mom: No.
University of Alabama
Hipster guy to two girls with horrified looks on their faces: So it had been like a zit or a boil when he was seventeen, but because it never got treated… There was, like, a tunnel, and then… (passes out of earshot)
The Danforth
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: wondering what the hell came after the tunnel
History prof: Benjamin Harrison was a pretty boring guy, with all the personality of a statue…I’m sure he couldn’t even…
[Class snickers.]History prof: Oh god, you fricken teenagers, you drag everything into the gutter!
Colorado University
Boulder, Colorado
High-school girl #1: Caveman.
High-school girl #2: Arm-sex!
High-school girl #1: That never gets old.
High-school girl #2: Yeah!
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: SpamiKami
