Male art student: I’m in a creative writing class and I’ve been writing a lot of stories about mayonnaise.
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Male art student: I’m in a creative writing class and I’ve been writing a lot of stories about mayonnaise.
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Jewish man: I am not sexist!
Jewish man’s friend: You are so sexist Archie Bunker is embarrassed.
Jewish man: I’m not sexist. I’ll stab a chick in her junk!
Israeli Martial Arts Class
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Ari
Boy #1, talking to friend in between classes: Hey what did you do in English?
Boy #2: Oh… I broke up with Jessica*.
Berryhill High School
Oklahoma
Overheard by: BlakeMas
Teen girl #1: Your dad could be a plumber because of his moustache.
Teen girl #2: My dad doesn’t have a moustache.
Teen girl #1: Well I wish he did.
Teen girl #2: Too bad, bitch!
North Bay
Ontario
Canadia
Suit #1: I meant ‘tramp’ like a homeless person.
Suit #2: Ohhh. Well, that changes everything.
Yonge and College
Toronto
Canadia
Blonde: I wish I was a dad. It would be so funny!
Wellington
New Zealand
Overheard by: Sars
Professor: So if we played the word association game, and I said the word “ice cream”, Tiffany might say “playground” because she used to eat ice cream on the playground. And then maybe if I said the words “ice cream” to Tom, he might say “sex” because he’s a serial rapist.
Tom: But I’m not.
SUNY
Geneseo, New York
Overheard by: Colin
Mother to daughter: You don’t want to piss me off in the happiest place on earth!
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
Ex-husband: I can’t believe you brought a date to our divorce hearing.
Ex-wife: Fuck you! You hooked up with a girl in court.
Ex-husband: I didn’t “hook-up” with her, we made plans for lunch today.
Ex-wife: And that’s better?
Ex-husband: Actually, it’s quite impressive. I rock, you suck, I’m getting laid tonight.
Ex-wife: I got laid last night.
Ex-husband: That’s because you are a dirty hooker.
San Diego Family Court
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Sean
Girl on cell: Listen, he is not a nice guy. Anyone with handcuffs permanently attached to his bed frame is not a nice guy.
University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia
