The Training Begins in the Womb

Drunk guy: Excuse me assholes, pregnant woman coming through.
Drunk pregnant wife: I fell down the stairs yesterday, my baby is like one of the warriors from 300.

Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: MN

Posted on October 15, 2008
Couples, Default, Drunks, Georgia, Guys, Insults, Movies, Preggers, Pregnancy, Weirdness, Women

But I Hear There's a Starbucks There Now

Waiter: I think it would be cool to live on the moon…
Waitress: Yeah, I don't think I could do that. I'm afraid of heights.

Texas City, Texas

Overheard by: TurboCat

Posted on October 15, 2008
Coworkers, Default, Fears, Guys, Servers, Stupidity, Texas, Women

And Any Time I Look Down

Student: Hermaphrodites have everything. They have the whole package.
Professor: Yeah, hermaphrodites have it all. I've seen it on the internet.

Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Claire

Posted on October 14, 2008
Connecticut, Default, Health & Hygiene, Internet, Sexuality, Students, Teachers

When Spies Go on Dates

Man coming out of Tibetan restaurant: But I saw the rabbit!
Woman: No, the rabbit is dead. I promise you, the rabbit is dead.

Boulevard de Magenta
Paris, France

Overheard by: Texpat

Posted on October 14, 2008
Animals, Death & dying, Default, Fears, Food, France, Guys, Women

…Who Never Invite Me to Your Parties

Professor, discussing the concept of virtue in literature: Today, when you hear the word “virtue”, you just kind of laugh. And that's because your souls are all festering masses of corruption.

Literary Theory Class
Ottawa
Canadia

Overheard by: Reb

Posted on October 14, 2008
Canadia, Class, Compare and contrast, Default, Education, Teachers, Weirdness, Words

Other Than Getting Punched, of Course

Chick: Giving a blow job is totally the best lip plumper.

Alameda, California

Posted on October 13, 2008
Advice, Beauty, BJs, Body parts, California, Chicks, Default

At Least Pretend to Turn It Off

Flight attendant: Please ensure that your mobile phone is switched off for take-off. If you don't know how to turn your phone off, there are plenty of kids on this flight who do.

Adelaide Airport
Australia

Posted on October 12, 2008
Age and ageing, Airports & flights, Australia, Cell phones, Compare and contrast, Default, Flight attendants, Offers and requests, Public transportation

The Wastebasket?

Professor: We're so obsessed about wasting time. But where does the time go when it's wasted?

San Diego, California

Posted on October 12, 2008
California, Default, Philosophy, Questions, Teachers, Time Management

David Hasselhoff Preps for His Next Audition

Guy on urinal on the phone: Yeah, let slip the dogs of war…protein. No truer words have ever been spoken…Shakespeare didn't know shit… (farts loudly) Fuck! (farts again) Fuck. Energy drinks…I'm outta here.

George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia

Posted on October 12, 2008
Books, Burping & farting, Colleges & Universities, Default, Drinking & drunks, Guys, On the phone, Restroom, Virginia, Weirdness, Words

Just Once, I'd Like Somebody to Weep With Gratitude

Annoying girl #1: She's the only girl I know that really wants to fuck a 90-year-old man.
Annoying girl #2: I really would!

Chilis, New Jersey

Overheard by: K

Posted on October 12, 2008
Age and ageing, Default, Friends, Girls, New Jersey, Sexuality, Weirdness, Wishes

Default