Drunk girl in bar to bartender: You should be so lucky as to have sex with me.
Bartender: I wouldn’t fuck you for practice.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: warm ups?
Drunk girl in bar to bartender: You should be so lucky as to have sex with me.
Bartender: I wouldn’t fuck you for practice.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: warm ups?
Angry father, to young daughter: Do you wanna go to Chuck E. Cheese?
Daughter: [scared silence]Father: Then stop touching shit!
Wal-Mart
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Molly BOOM
Girl walking to bus stop drunk: I just wanted to walk in, get groped and leave.
Pheasant Run
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Brandon Call
Girl: I think my ribs are double-jointed.
Columbia, Missouri
Overheard by: Kelsey
Girl #1: At least he didn’t say what JD said to me the other night. He said I was boring in the bedroom because I didn’t try new things.
Girl #2: Oh my god!
Girl #1: Yeah and I told him, well how am I supposed to know what to do? I was a virgin before you. Well, not literally a virgin, but close enough!
Girl #2: So what are you going to do?
Girl #1: Well, I told him that when we go on vacation, we can have a threesome. But it has to be someone I’ll never see again.
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Overheard by: Slutgers Girl
Preppy girl on cell: the longest amount of time I’ve had pubic hair is three days.
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: kt
Girl #1: Hanging out with him on his birthday was so much fun!
Girl #2: Oh, I heard about that! He went to jail, right?
Brooklyn Avenue
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Glad they’re not my friends
Blonde clone: It’s not that we’re both Leos. He’s just a dick.
Westfield Mall
San Diego, California
Bitter guy: Girls don’t care about men, so I can’t relate to them. And men only care about sports, food, video games, and women. I do like to eat, but I hate women. I don’t like sports at all, and I’m soooo good at video games that other people can’t play with me because I am just too awesome.
Girl sitting at the table with him: Yeah…
University of Massachusetts
Amherst, Massachusetts
Goth girl: I’m so proud of my sister. The rest of her classmates are doing their final projects on chihuahuas and stuff like that. My sister? Serial killers.
Friend: Dude, you’re turning her into a you.
Goth girl: I know! My mom is so pissed at me.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
