Professor, during a discussion about Lear’s daughters in King Lear: well, don’t you guys ever lie?
(class stays silent)
Professor: You all lie, especially the girls.
Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia
Professor, during a discussion about Lear’s daughters in King Lear: well, don’t you guys ever lie?
(class stays silent)
Professor: You all lie, especially the girls.
Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia
20-something guy with ridiculous hair cut: Like, I’m not saying that mother earth isn’t my priority, because like she totally is, I’m just saying that I’m not going to like let her run my life. At the end of the day.
8th & Chestnut
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Girl to friends: I’m 31 years old, for Christ’s sake. My mom doesn’t get it. I’m too fucking old to get excited about some guy that pisses himself, calls me up and acts like it’s a fucking achievement.
Bar
Atlanta, Georgia
Girl: I really don’t know why I have such an unhealthy obsession with lesbians.
Bakersfield, California
Teacher: I’m leaving for a few minutes. Ted*, you’re in charge.
Ted*: Alright, everyone get naked.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Woman: …and Scarlett Johansson is in it.
Husband: Really? Okay, let’s go.
Woman (to ticket seller): Oh, now he’ll watch it.
(they enter the theater)
Husband: And you said sex too, right?
Movie Theater
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Guy walking opposite traffic on a one-way street: If I get hit by another car my mom will be pissed.
Clemson, South Carolina
College student to friend: Scott* is so funny. Like, last night, he was looking at his penis…
University of Delaware
Little girl in bathroom stall with mother: Doody! It’s fun to say “doody” in the bathroom! Say “doody,” mom!
Whole Foods
West Orange, New Jersey
Overheard by: I almost said it myself.
Student: I’m as much like Hitler as Hitler was.
Ball State University
Muncie, Indiana
Overheard by: Kat
